Sharing is Caring

Since so much has been going on I feel like today is a two blog post day.
So, onward!

W and I have this monthly kink night we go to at a local swinger club. I asked my husband, R if he would let W borrow the car for us to go to help save money on Uber.  At first, he made a face. R is really intense about the car and I never in a million years thought that asking was even a remotely good idea, but things have been going so well between them lately, I thought I'd give it a shot. I said to him, "Don't answer right now. Take some time to think about it."

Later that night he said it was fine.

So, we go to the kink night, W has to rearrange the mirrors and the steering wheel, he's taller than R, so it's an issue. I worry about the next morning when R will have to fix all the mirrors, that he will think it's a massive pain in the ass and never let W borrow the car again. W gave his car to his ex-wife in the divorce. A new one is in his future, but for now, we Uber or bus generally. W dearly misses driving, so seeing him drive made me so happy,  I could tell he was so into it. Something about this made me so happy and maybe a little hot. W and R are not dating, but I said the other day, I love their blooming bromance. It's something like compersion seeing them get along so well,  R warming up to W is so lovely. Because R does NOT warm to people quickly or easily. This was a hard-won battle in some ways. But, he finally admitted, he doesn't see W leaving any time soon, so he's finally 'letting him in.'

The next day, we are about to Uber out to a club to dance. R says to "just take the car." I'm in shock. I'm so happy beyond words, it might seem like just some small thing, but to me, it's a huge deal and shows a lot of trust. I'm pretty much sitting here crying happy tears as I write this. Life. Is. Good.

Even when it's hard, and that is okay.


*~*~*Slutty Heart*~*~*

The Learning Curve

So, since the last time I blogged here (I plan to start keeping up with this nonsense), a lot has happened. W's divorce has taken longer than expected. It is final February 8th, 2019 and I can. Not. Wait. BUT, since it's taken so long and he happened upon a new love interest, things are moving along sooner than I thought that they would. Also, this new love interest is a good friend of mine (we have been friends for like 15 years.).

I've been poly a very long time. I sometimes see problems coming from a mile away with W, and I call it to his attention and say maybe we can work this out before it becomes an issue. I am then met with 'oh no, no issue.' Then, of course, the thing I was so worried about happening, happens. A lot of the neglect I sometimes feel comes from the fact that they are both experiencing NRE and I really really try and let a lot go due to that. Because I've been there. I'm still there to a degree. I can let a lot slide, but he needs to know it's not an excuse and he has to do better. We had a long talk this morning, about something that happened last night. He admitted where he was wrong and came up with his own suggestions as to how to keep those things from happening in the future. I was kind of proud of him for that. As the more experienced partner, I'd really hate to have all of our problems fall on my shoulders, and I will be the one to try and fix everything.

I'm not sure just how detailed I want to be here. I kind of want to make a poly advice column based on the problems we encounter and post about ways we try and fix those problems. So, maybe look out for more detailed stuff later on, but, just know dear reader, everything is good, I'm happy, and we will tackle issues as they rear their heads. I am cautiously optimistic. ;)

*~*~*Slutty Heart*~*~*