Columbus took a chance

Lately, there have been some issues with B and I and trying to figure out exactly where things are, where they will go, if anywhere at all, from what B says, it's a 50/50 chance, and hey, I love gambling. What can I say?

I wrote this for B, in response to our 'talk' about 'us'.

Columbus Took A Chance

I wish I could say this was a story of unrequited love

at least then I would be tragic, brokenhearted,

exhausted by my own wretched sobs

Instead I kind of feel a funny mushy feeling

in your general direction

I ask you if it's a mistake to care

and you tell me wordlessly

that it's the very best mistake

When I try and walk away

you tell me in a song

"if this means anything at all

don't let me leave you."

And unfortunately it does mean something

If only, I knew what

I know only that I adore the little bruises

you leave behind

and your crooked smile

the way you whisper "you're beautiful."

My other love fears for my one day

inevitably broken heart

I'm a grownup I tell her

I can take it

Some days it's as if my world gets lost

in your almond eyes

and one day you'll just blink

and become a destroyer of worlds

Maybe there are no wretched sobs in this story

this tale of the funny mushy feeling

that I feel in your general direction

but there are silent tears

banging behind my eyes

on nights that I can't find sleep

Not because I can't imagine me without you

but because I can't imagine not even letting the reigns go slack

not trying, not being naked and truthful with you

not discovering in myself a vulnerable person

willing to let this story unfold

I would rather ask myself a week from now

a month or a year

what have I done?

with tears shining in my eyes, while I tell a story

of unrequited love

than say that I wish I had tried.

*~*~*Slutty Heart*~*~*