Friday, May 19, 2017

"Friends are family you choose for yourself."

A woman at work said to me
“I get the gay thing, the bi thing, I don’t get the non-monogamous thing.”

I can’t help but wonder why people have such difficulty with this. I GET the monogamous thing, and that is that I GET it, literally, without ever having been monogamous myself. I don’t see the appeal, but I’m not bothered by it, nor do I find it particularly mind-boggling.

I can only speak from my own experience.
I am at work, so I don’t say to her, what I want to say, which is: 

Hey lady, if you think loving and being loved by one amazing person is incredible, try adding a few more and see maybe if you aren’t walking around with a smile plastered on your face all day too.

I feel so much joy in my poly life. Someone asked me today how my life was going, we hadn’t spoken in a while, and they said, “How is poly life treating you?” I’m so lucky, that even when my life is in shambles at work, when my mental health is in disarray and my physical health is failing too….the one constant is that my relationships are all fantastic in their own ways. I have such an amazing poly family, I can not begin to express my gratitude here. I am loved, and it feels really, really lovely. :)

My mom always said I was poly because I came from a broken/unstable family life. This could be true. I can’t really say, but if I had set out to create a better family for myself, than the cold and unloving one that I grew up with as a child, then I did a DAMN excellent job of it. Because I am surrounded by people who love me, and I love them, and we are family. I have such a strong sense of family with all of these people, and I just could not imagine my life without them at this point. They have all been around from the ‘newest’ partner, at 5 years to the ‘oldest’ partner of 22 years. These people are not flings or romp n’ roll in the hay playtime buddies. These are people I’m making memories with, memories that will last a lifetime. People who I can count on, who care about me, people who I am lucky to call partners and privileged to call family. If I somehow have set out subconsciously to build the perfect, loving, caring, supportive family, fuck it, I’ve succeeded.

For those who just don’t get it, or think I’m just being slutty, you have entirely missed the point. 

*~*~*Slutty Heart*~*~*

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